Wow, things really took a sudden turn for the serious around here. I’m sorry I had to do that to you. I’m in a place of great introspection and other important things like making mix tapes for my 7th grade boyfriend who is going to really be surprised to hear form me after all these years.

I have been, quite literally, stunned by all the wonderful and kind things you have had to say to me here, via email and in several other mediums. It is amazing how the tubes of this Internet can bring us all together to say such nice things and, best of all, they’re about me. I feel like it’s my birthday but without the cake and, really…how hard would it be for someone to send me a cake? I’ll give you my address…you only have to ask.

As I was telling Janie’s new sister-wife, Monica, over a very long and swear-filled (she called me a cunt, you guys!) chat last night/at 530am, I do not want to appear as if I wander around in this cloud of misery all day, every day. Yes, I have some problems (oh, really…I couldn’t tell, you asshole) and I carry them around with me all the time because they are a part of me. Despite that, I have a really happy life. I have a most gorgeous and supportive wife that loves me, a dog that tries to follow me out the door to work every morning, a family that is intensely loyal and crazy in love with me despite my varied imperfections and all that shit I did in years 1-24, friends that make me laugh and cry and usually both at the same time and three cats that keep me in my place by peeing on my bath towel. I have immeasurable joys that I do not want to appear at all ungrateful for. I have so much more than many other people and that, too, is overwhelming.

When I started posting on this website I didn’t know how it would turn out and there have been innumerable times where I have wanted to quit and run the other direction because I have felt…boring. And the one thing that has kept me here are the people who read this website and tell me that I have connected with them in some way. And there is little else in my life that is as precious as the idea that even one word I write here has brought a smile to someone’s face. That alone is worth the struggle to stay and work it out and I am ever grateful to have friends like each of you, regardless of the cake issue which I hope we can resolve ASAP.

So if you promise to keep reading and maybe just email me or comment or hit me up in Google chat to say hello and tell me about your day and spend some time listening to me talk about how my rotting ovaries are rotting and rolling around in my shoe, I promise to keep writing and being hilarious because you deserve that much. Let’s all get married and live together on a compound in the remote wilderness of Montana. We can make our own cheese and wash our clothes by beating them on a rock by the river. Its going to be awesome. Amen.