Nothing brings a bunch of drunk whiteys together like Lynrd Skynrd.

Janie, Carson pooped in the office.
Again!?
Yes, but this time it was just a small piece to tell us,  “I disagree.”
Well, that’s an improvement.

Drugs and drinking will ruin people’s lives, Janie.
I know.
I mean, look at _____. One of the smartest people I ever knew and then she started drinking and then was addicted to drugs. She ruined her life.
Yeah.
Yeah. And where is she now? She’s dead.
She is not dead.
No, she isn’t. She’s in California.

I’ve been thinking about doing something ridiculous. I’ve had these thoughts for weeks now.
What is it?
I’ve been thinking about riding my bicycle to work.
Oh, really?
Yeah. I’d just go by the trains and then along the water and then down Second Avenue and I’m there. It’s pretty flat.
That sounds like a good idea.
So I just need to get a good seat.
Uh huh.
And a bicycle.