Dear Asshole Neighbor

Maybe you could try your hardest to be a decent neighbor and you and your little bitch friends could maybe shut the fuck up so that the rest of the neighborhood could get some sleep. I’ve been pretty kind over the weeks, putting up with a constant chorus of “Ooooooooohhhh” coming from your windows as [&hellip

Dear Dr. Phil

I was reading your column in the June 2008 issue of Oprah magazine. To be clear, this magazine is not mine, we have a subscription at my office and when I’ve read all the People magazines we have in the reception area, I grab Oprah out of desperation. In this recent column, you suggested that [&hellip

Dear Robin-O

It has been some time since I’ve written you back and so I thought I’d post my response here, on the Internet, for all to see my shame at being a terrible corresponder. My friend Kristiina called me on Valentine’s Day and I promised to call her back. I’m still planning on it. I have [&hellip

To the assistant...

While you were preparing to draw blood for that allergy test, I should have known. It should have been obvious when you started to explain your “one prick” rule whereby you give yourself one chance to do it right, or find someone else who can. If not that, I should definitely have started to second-guess [&hellip

Dear Janie

If you eat those shrimp you’re gonna be in so much trouble!  I mean it! Hands off the scrimps! Love, Linsey

Dear Oprah

I looked online at your list of favorite things and I noticed that the majority were chosen from Williams Sonoma. It’s like you went to the mall, walked into the first expensive chain store you saw and started to point at things that looked pretty- items that regular people would use in their regular lives, [&hellip

Dear Raisins

I think you’re really gross. Stay out of my baked goods. Love, Linsey

Dear Tyra

How are you? If you asked me how I am doing, I would tell you I am doing fine. What do you think I should do about the spam comments that keep showing up in my comment moderation files? Today I’ve received about six inappropriate comments from “people” offering me all sorts of pornographic links. [&hellip

Dear Eva Longoria

Hi there. I saw you on the television today, during a commercial break while watching the season premier of Project Runway. I like your hair up in a ponytail like that. I thought it looked really good. I hardly recognized you, until you opened your mouth. Eva Longoria, you’re a beautiful person and I’m sure [&hellip