I have a sinus infection related to my surgery.  I am back on antibiotics.  How did I figure this out?  For two days I have been smelling what I can only describe as: if you put some hamburger in direct sunlight for several days until it got nice and rotting, then shoved it up my nose.  Super!

I’m totally grossed out.

In other news, Janie and I have done no gift shopping for anyone anywhere.  We’ve been planning on making at least half of our gifts by hand, and you know what?  We’ve made two.  I’ve made two.  Janie had the idea to make the gifts we are making, but she’s made about 1/3 of one.  Seriously.  This is a bullshit.  So, I’m probably going to be handing out all our gifts late, or else I’ll see what I can find around the house:  three (very bad) cats, that bottle of beer in the back of the fridge left over from this summer, an old cell phone, WillMaker Plus, a well-used book on chemical dependency counseling and half a prescription of Vicodin.

Merry Christmas, friends and family.  We’re terrible people.


  1. December 16, 2008

    You just have to remember that to give is better than to receive. With that in mind the best gift you can give others is to let them give you things. Take this terrible task on and let everyone else feel good. By only receiving you may have to suffer but should feel better about all the joy you allow others to have at your expense. In fact it’s nearly saintly.

  2. E's Mom
    December 16, 2008

    We are in the same boat, except that we can’t make our gifts anymore because the table that we need to use is under my bed. E did already pick out from what we did make your gifts, so you are good. I only require mild entertainment and some booze. I’m easy.

  3. December 16, 2008

    Sounds like fun at your house.

    I’m in the same boat as far as gifts; knitted two with one to go, but the rest of the folks? NO CLUE. I figure I’ll just get them subscriptions to Bitch and say next year, tell me what you want ahead of time.

  4. heathen
    December 16, 2008

    I want to learn how to knit animals and one year everyone i know will get a yarn animal from me, except they’ll have to keep them at my house.

  5. December 17, 2008

    You should have taken my advice from the get-go and spent 20 minutes online. Go to the Etsy website and buy a bunch of homemade stuff someone else made and pass it off as your own. Or, failing that head to the liquor store and buy everyone liquor. Everyone loves liquor.

  6. heathen
    December 17, 2008

    Well, I am buying a few Etsy things and last year I gave out a lot of liquor. My next stop is Goodwill, to see what kind of “antiques” they have for under a dollar.

  7. December 17, 2008

    I hear vicodin makes a great stocking stuffer!

  8. Robin O
    December 18, 2008

    Oh, yucky. So sorry. Hope those antibiotics are doing their job by now. Can you stick some antibiotics directly into your nose? That’s what I’d be tempted to do if I were you.

    Also, I think the Vicodin and the used book on chemical counseling should come as a combo gift.

  9. December 19, 2008

    seriously? your blog is my present.

  10. heathen
    December 20, 2008

    oh, leah – I promised you’d get a monster, and yours will be on its way as soon as I can get to a post office. 🙂 probably today.

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