In a Scrape

Janie wasn’t feeling well this morning and so she elected to spend a few extra minutes lounging in bed with a book, covered with every blanket in the house because it’s cold as balls in this place. The cats had been fed and Carson wandered in, looking ready for a nap. I picked her up and put her on the bed next to Janie, who was trying to coax her into her lap. Carson is one of those cats who will never just come into your lap and show affection, you have to take it without her permission, like all those quarters in the bottom of your dad’s sock drawer. Janie scooped her up, but in that very moment, something happened. Maybe there was a noise, perhaps the neighbor upstairs fell off the bed or maybe that invisible bug Harlow had been chasing earlier in the morning flew up her booty. Whatever it was, it scared her and she tried desperately to skitter away, but the only surface providing traction was Janie’s wrist, which Carson shredded with her razor claws.


I put some hydrogen peroxide on it right away to disinfect it as best as possible. We didn’t have any bandages in the house other than the one you see on her pinky, covering one of the puncture wounds. Ironically, the band aid has a very naughty looking cat on it. I fashioned a makeshift dressing out of a small Poise pantyliner and wrapped her wrist in an ace bandage which would do until I had a chance to run to the store. I had to go to Target to get some cat litter and toilet paper anyway, so I added bandages to my list. About three hours and $150.00 later I returned with several bags of things that weren’t on my list, some antibiotic ointment and gauze bandages. I fixed her up with a bandage using a combination of techniques learned in my high school sports medicine class, a first aid/CPR certification course and six seasons of Xena: Warrior Princess.



  1. January 7, 2008

    Yikes. That cat should come with a warning label.

    P.S. I need to go to Target, too. I have three things on my list. Bets on how many things I carry out of there?

  2. LizzieLou
    January 7, 2008

    Don’t forget your Mini Med School training!

    Xena didn’t have a Target – she used cobwebs and tree sap to tend to wounds – but if she did, I think she too would have picked up a magnetic to-do list and stuck it on her breast plate.

    #1. get juices flowing
    #2. practice many skills
    #3. come up with new way to put mouth on Gabrielle without being overtly gay

  3. heathen
    January 7, 2008

    Pamela –

    I’m going to go with two bags of stuff that you didn’t need.

    LizzieLou –

    what about: die – come back to life – die come back to life – die – come back to life…

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